When Parents Quarrel – Common Effects Children Experience

When parents quarrel they affect their children in unhealthy ways. When they fight and get hurt by words, they tend to say and do something equally hurting.  Often, they do worse things to the other person.  Although parents may regret the effects it brings, the damage has been done to children. Rather than filling the house with love and unity, they find a dungeon-like home, cold and dark. Lots of parents who quarrel just keep the marriage despite frequent disagreements, completely destroying the home's harmony.

What happens to kids when parents quarrel?

1.   Feelings get hurt. Children do have fragile hearts. It hurts them deeply to watch their parents quarrel. The effects become worse when the conflict concerns about the children.

2.   Feelings of insecurity. The atmosphere around the children’s home becomes unsafe. They start to feel insecure because of the hazardous and harmful effects caused by quarrels.     

3.  Hostility effects among children. When parents have arguments usually it involves resentments, anger, and exchange of hurtful words.  If parents are not careful at all, the bad effects could lead the child’s astray. This is how conflicts between parents could go far.   

4.   Poor communications. Members of the family refrain from speaking.  Lack of communication dominates, because one person is anxious to express himself to the other members. Then other may turn bitter towards the next.  The outcome effects are extended to the entire family.   

5.   Effects are not kept secret. When parents quarrel, no matter how much they try to keep it, the effects will eventually be revealed.  Children suffer much about it since they’re unprepared and sensitive.

 When your parents fight what are the effects at home?

1.   Kids logically look up to their parents; they feel that one day they’ll be like their dad or their mom. How their little hearts shrink when their role models are seen quarreling instead of loving.  When parents quarrel, the effects could poison the home’s ambiance. A mom and a dad, even with no intention, would hurt their innocent kids.  It is discouraging and traumatic for kids to watch and hear their parents always quarrel.

2.   Psychologists state that kids often put the blame on themselves.  They think their parents are fighting because of them.  And the effects to the kids? They feel they are bad that’s why their parents quarrel every day. Without knowing the bad effects, parents will burden their kids with remorse as consequences of their frequent disputes.

 3.   It is even worse when a mom or a dad (after a quarrel)  forces the kids to take sides.   One partner may talk about the shortfall of the other partner in an attempt to win the kids' empathy. Sociologists say that  kids who grow up in homes where parents quarrel a lot have the effects of becoming argumentative spouses when they get married.

 Generally, no parents have intentions to harm their kids, but often things happen just as they should like when parents quarrel.  Fighting in front of your children will have serious effects. When bad effects happen, gentle explanations to children are important to get rid of clouds and doubts in their minds.  Responsible parents must show love and care by trying their best to save their children and avoid the “parents quarrel.”


When Parents Quarrel - Common Effects Children Experience  is a post on Modern Parenting Tips: Styles & Approach to Train & Discipline Children



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