June 19, 2011

All-Time Parenting Styles: Which One is the Most Effective?


There are still four popular parenting styles and approaches being practiced in this modern age: detached, permissive, authoritarian and authoritative styles.  Despite the modern lifestyle and living, there are actually no new approaches to update the parenthood mechanism.  These four styles still exist today because they speak more of the parent’s life, behaviors and perspective—far away from what the technology offers.

Just like in traditional times, they remain applicable in our days and in the future:

1.   Detached – Disconnected parents will grow up neither challenging nor receptive.  Children are treated with carelessness and unawareness of their basic needs: love, discipline and quality time.  Consequently, sons and daughters will develop higher degree of behavioral difficulties including psychological problems compared to children of their age. 

They don’t feel worthy of their parents’ love and attention.  They always long for warmth hug, touch coming from the people they trust.  Detached parenting style creates a negative impact to innocent children about their importance in the family.  This will carry on as they grow up to be adults.

2.   Permissive – Lenient mothers and fathers have unmanageable capacity to control their children’s behavior.  There is inconsistency of obeying home rules and regulations.  Children may or may not decide to go after the rules, and the extent is not clear.  What they understand is that they can do whatever behavior they want to.  Rules are vague and formless that’s why children are inconsistent in being disciplined.

What is permissive parenting?  Permissive parents bring up bad-mannered, destructive, bold, and immature offspring.  They possess insecurity in behavior because they are short of guidelines necessary to direct right behavior.  Role reversals normally occur: children are the ones giving orders and parents just obey them.

3.   Authoritarian – Parents do implement strict, rigid rules.  Their expectation from children is total obedience without any further questioning.  A child is forced to absorb family principles and practices.  Most of the time, they impose physical retribution and abandonment of love to form the kind of character they want their children to develop.  Parents like these are regarded as strict disciplinarians.

As a result, sons and daughters become sad, frightened, annoyed and have mood swings.  They also develop low self-esteem, withdrawals, timidity and other poor personality traits.  Because of withdrawn love, they generally become rebellious or threats to the society.

4.   Authoritative – This is the most effective parenting style that produces autonomous, happy, loving children.  They demonstrate value for the child’s feeling and opinions. They listen and attempt to get their children’s views and discuss them appropriately.  Although parents have the final authority to decide, they still permit some negotiations. 

The principles of the authoritative parenting style are firm.  They show love and discipline as opposed to being powerful.  They are likely to be demanding and approachable.  They explain certain rules.  Some benefits are deprived if children may disobey, instead of punishing them.

There will always be modern innovations, improved technology, gadgets and devices that are launched in this generation.  All-time parenting styles are the bases for successful or unsuccessful parenthood.  How your children are shaped and formed to be what they are in the future will depend on what parenting style you’re applying to them now.



All-Time Parenting Styles: Which One is the Most Effective?  is  a post on  Modern Parenting Tips: Styles & Approach to Train & Discipline Children


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